Cirilli’s Second Meditation Lesson & Practice
Chapter 1: Atalaya and Vaz talk
Atalaya sighed in relief when they returned Captain Skarne to the cabin that had been put aside for holding him. That there had been no change in his answers once Nevil’s truth spell had been set was reassuring. And it wasn’t. There were far too many Red Wizards and Sea Princes working to destabilize the area. The thought that Hawk might have The Eye that they were looking for was both good and bad news. They had a starting place to focus on retrieving the missing artifact, but Hawk? Why did it have to be Hawk who was believed to have The Eye? She looked across the room at Vaz, but couldn’t read his expression. He seemed distant, as if his thoughts were far away.
Walking over to him, Atalaya stopped a few feet in front of him and waited for him to see her. When he finally looked up and found her standing before him, a wan smile crossed his face and his hand reached out to her. “Did you need something?” he asked.
Atalaya sat down next to him at the table. “Are you okay? You seemed far away.”
“Just thinking about The Eye and Captain Hawk. It’s going to be difficult to get The Eye away from her. I had hoped that I wasn’t going to have to see her again.” While he was talking, Vaz had taken her hand and brought it to the table and was unconsciously tracing her fingers. “I don’t like the fact that we are going to have to chase her down.”
Vasilya took a deep breath and pushed the thoughts of Captain Hawk out of his mind. “You wanted something. What was it?”
“I’m going to work with Cirilli on her meditation practice again this morning. We are hoping for better weather this afternoon for her weapons training. Can we use the cabin for a bit… maybe an hour to an hour and a half? And if so, is there anything you want to get out of there before we start?”
Vasilya thought for a minute. “Let me get my cards and crystal. If you and Cirilli are going to be virtuous and practice I guess I should too. I’ll just use one of the empty crew rooms. Actually, I’m thinking about making it into a sitting room, a place where I can practice my ‘lessons’ and give you space when you need it. I need to think about it some more … maybe the room next to ours?”
“That sounds like a good idea. You think about that and we can make some plans for it later.” Atalaya stands, I’m going to get something to drink and then collect Cirilli.”
In the galley she found a cup and a tea strainer, searched through the herbal teas until she found one she liked with a variety of flowers and lemon in it. Fixing the tea and letting it seep in the hot water that was almost always found on the stove she waited the few minutes needed until it was ready. As she sipped it Nevil came through the galley. At Nevil’s raised eyebrow Atalaya chuckled. “It’s just tea, herbal tea, I just need something to drink, and I’ve had enough coffee for now.” Nevil laughed as Atalaya made her escape.
At Cirilli’s room she knocked on the door. When Cirilli answered the knock, Atalaya asked her to get her leather grips and the token she gave her and bring them to her cabin. Cirilli nodded and walked to her chest and gathered them. She followed Atalaya to the stern cabin.
Chapter 2: Practice
Once inside, Atalaya took off her sword belt, placing it and her sword on the desk. Kicking off her boots she reached into her belt pouch looking for her meditation token and then jumped onto the bed, waiting for Cirilli. Cirilli had watched Atalaya’s preparation, took a deep breath and copied them. After her boots were kicked off and left near Atalaya’s , she placed her belt and sword on the desk. Gathering up the leather grip and her own token she made her way to the bed. Gulping, she got up onto the bed and sat facing Atalaya. “What are we going to do today?” she asked bravely.
Atalaya settled herself again, making sure that her muscles were loose and that she was comfortable in her tailor-sit position. “We are going to talk, I am going to answer questions, and you are going to practice relaxing your muscles again.” She looked at Cirilli sensing both her uneasiness and her determination. “Which would you like to start with?”
Cirilli looked startled, “I get to choose?”
“Of course. There are advantages to starting with any one of those choices. But we can always return to any one of those if there is need later.”
Cirilli picked up the token that Atalaya gave her. “Let’s start with questions then. She turns the token over in her hands a couple of times. “This is beautiful. But, what is it and why does it have Gwaeron’s symbol on it?”
Atalaya took the token from her and held it cupped in her hands for a moment. She then reached for her own token and handed it to Cirilli. “These are meditation focuses. Once you have learned to relax, they can help you focus and center your thoughts to reach a meditative state. I like to use mine to reach that state. Not everyone uses a focus, but for those who do the focus can take many different forms. Some like to use the flame of a candle or the flames of a fire. Others may use some other item that feels good in their hand. I’ve heard of others that focus on the moon or a living flower or some other such thing of nature. It’s really very individual. Most of the others in my father's village who were learning meditation at the same time as I was, tried many different things as their focuses before they picked the one that worked best for them. I also tried many different items but was having a very hard time reaching my centering point until Sossheni gave me this. It was a gift she gave me on my tenth birthday after I described to her how my father was teaching me, and how I was not able to center without his voice guiding me.
Cirilli turned Atalaya’s token over several times, looking carefully at both sides. “I like the unicorn. Why didn’t you put a unicorn on mine?”
“Because that is the symbol for Mielikki. I didn’t think that you would want a goddess’s symbol on your token. She is the goddess who holds my highest esteem and my worship. I give honor to several others that Mielikki works with and are also involved with maintaining the integrity of the forests and other wild lands. But it is Mielikki to whom I have given my worship and devotion.”
Cirilli turns the token over. “Why a leaf on this side and not a bow and quiver like on mine?”
Atalaya reaches over to trace the leaf with her finger. “That is an ash leaf and it symbolizes Sossheni, who gave me this token. The addition of the blazing star also makes it symbolize Mielikki. It’s an older symbol for her and can be made with either the ash leaf or an oak leaf.”
Taking up her own token, Atalaya returns Cirilli’s to her, the side with the bow facing her. “Look at yours, please. Feel the bow and the quiver with your fingers. While rangers learn to use the sword and there are even those who primarily use the sword, rangers are known by the people as skilled hunters and users of the bow, especially the use of the longbow. You already show good skill with your shortbow. I have no doubts that as you reach your full growth you will learn and master the longbow as well.” As Atalaya talks, her cadence begins shifting so that she is speaking in a low, soft and deliberately slow pace. “Every ranger finds a bow that feels good in their hands, that becomes an extension of their hands and will. There are many reasons the rangers use their bows. To provide food for themselves and their people is often one of the first reasons.”
Atalaya watched Cirilli as she told the story of the token. Cirilli’s body softened and her breathing slowed as she listened and continued to trace her fingers over the tooled design. A fleeting smile passed over her face when Cirilli actually closed her eyes as she continued to listen and fiddle with the token. “Remember you are always in control and can come back anytime you wish to,” Atalaya gently guides. “If you need to come back just run your fingers along the lacings.”
After a few moments Atalaya continued , “Another reason we use a bow is to be able to maintain a distance from our enemies as we provide safety for the area that we are responsible for. If we can cut down the orc or goblin or rabid animal that is attacking without having to get into melee with it, it is both safer for us and can decrease the number of opponents others of your party must face. But often rangers patrol an area alone. Then it is much better to keep your prey at a distance and prevent them from having a chance to harm you.”
Seeing that Cirilli continued to breathe deeply and slowly and that the level of tension had decreased significantly throughout her body, Atalaya grew silent for a moment and let her simply experience the peace she had reached. Cirilli’s hand stills and she just rests in stillness.
After a moment or so Atalaya continued. “Remember, you are in control. You can return any time you want or need to.” Atalaya waits a moment or two, waiting to see if Cirilli initiates a return to the present. When she doesn’t, Atalaya continues, “Turn the token over now and feel the design on this side. There is a bearpaw. Bears are strong and intelligent animals. Both of these are attributes of Gwaeron Windstrom. Gwaeron is the best of all rangers. He guides us and we learn our craft from him, to the point of his actually joining in the training, teaching us the skills that we need to learn. Sometimes he comes as an animal that the budding ranger is learning to track, standing near the trail so that the young ranger can learn to associate the track with the animal. Sometimes he comes as faerie fire to outline the track or sign that the learner has missed, so that they can learn what they should search for. And sometimes he will leave his own footprint to help guide the learner back to the trail he or she has lost. All rangers have a deep respect for Gwaeron. He teaches us how to become a master tracker and exemplifies the qualities that all rangers should strive to live by. And he reached these levels of skill himself as a human no different from you. If he could do this, so can we. That is the most important of the truths that he teaches to all rangers.
Atalaya grows silent again as she observes Cirilli. Well, I don’t think that there is any question as to whether or not Cirilli will be capable of learning to meditate. I was not expecting this response to my just talking to her. That wasn’t even a part of my plan for today. … So, she can open herself to a guided meditation. I can build on this I think. Guided meditations for now, while we work on her terrors outside of the practice sessions, so that she can experience the success of managing this state … and the peace that comes with it. Now, how to bring her back without startling her… She continues, “That’s good Cirilli, just feel the impressions in the leather on whichever side you wish. Good. Remember, you are always in charge here. When you are ready to come back I want you to feel the edges of the token, the laces of leather that tie the strength of the warrior to the spirit of the ranger. The roughness will help you bring your consciousness back to this room. Feel the movement of the ship. Hear waves crashing against the ship. Open your eyes when you are ready.”
Atalaya sits, her own body peaceful and relaxed as she waits for Cirilli to return. After several minutes she sees Cirilli turn the token in her hand so that her finger can run along the edges. Cirilli takes her time returning, but after many minutes she opens her eyes and looks at Atalaya.
“What happened? I feel…. I felt… Everything was calm and all the … I could hear you talking to me but it felt like you were far away from me and everything became still and my mind… it was quiet and I was just listening to you.” Cirilli looks at Atalaya. “Did you take over my mind?”
“No Daughter of my Heart, I did not. You stilled your mind and you entered into what is called a state of guided meditation. Which, by the way, was not anything close to what I had planned for today. But, if you have any concerns about whether or not you can calm your mind so that you can meditate please dismiss them. You are absolutely able to do this.” Atalaya gently folded her fingers around the token. “I think that this shall be an excellent focus for you for now. Perhaps at some other time you will wish for something else, but we will use it for now.” Atalaya continues to hold Cirilli’s hand as she watches her. “The calmness that it appears you are feeling right now is the result of calming your mind and just letting yourself be open to the energy of the world around you.”
Atalaya could see the moment when Cirilli lost the calm as a myriad of thoughts and feelings passed over her face. After a moment Cirilli said , “I heard you tell me several times that I could come back whenever I wanted. Was that true?”
Atalaya holds her arms out in invitation to Cirilli. After a long look, Cirilli eased forward and let herself be brought into Atalaya’s arms. “Child, that power is always yours during any type of meditation. I am honored that you chose instead to keep going deeper and deeper into the centering state.”
“Does this mean I can stop using the gripper to squeeze and release?” she asked hopefully.
“No. Sorry, you will need to keep up with that. That deep relaxation is needed when you are putting yourself into this state rather than being guided there by another.”
Cirilli sighed, but a mischievous look at Atalaya from under her eyelashes proved that her spirit was as impish as ever. “I had to ask, didn’t I?”
Atalaya laughed, “I suppose you did.”
“Why did you have me feel the edge of the token?” asked Cirilli.
“Because it is a very different sensation than that of the tooled impressions on either side of the token. That difference can be used as an aid to coming out of the place you had gone. That is called being centered by the way. It allows you to come out of centering slowly as you are comfortable with the change of state. If you needed or wanted to, you can always quickly snap yourself back, but that can be jarring to the mind and body, especially the first several times you do it. Slowly coming back is much easier for the beginner and makes returning to that state easier.”
Cirilli thought about Atalaya’s answer. “But if I had wanted to come out right away, I could have?”
“Yes,” Atalaya declared.
“Okay.” Cirilli looks relaxed again. “I really did that, didn’t I?”
“Yes you did, Daughter of my Heart. You are going to be a truly great ranger when your training is completed.”
Cirilli just sits with Atalaya’s arms around her, resting her head on Atalaya’s chest like a young child would rest with its mother. Dear child, did no one love on you when you were a little one? Well, you are mine now, and you are loved.
Finally feeling the small movements indicating that Cirilli was ready to sit up and move away, Atalaya released her. “Our training is done for today. Go, enjoy some time to yourself until lunchtime or until Nevil calls for you.
After Cirilli left the cabin Atalaya opened her hand and looked at her own token. “Mielikki, what just happened? A description of her token should not have sent her into her center. That wasn’t what I was planning to do. So what happened? Were you placing your hand on me? On her? Or was that Gwaeron reaching out to Cirilli?”
Atalaya sits staring at her token for a long time but received no answer that she could recognize. Finally she stood up, collecting her boots and belt which she donned before heading for the forecastle deck where she stood watching the waves parting before the ship’s bow. Several dolphins were seen racing along the sides of the ship, leaping and diving over each other as they followed along.
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